My story isn’t traumatic and horrible as the others in this site , but I feel so lonely that I don’t have anyone else to tell this. I’m from Guatemala ,it’s a country between El Salvador and Mexico and I’m 23 years old.
Fighting with internalised lesbophobia hasn’t been easy . I have had dreams about marrying a man so I don’t lose the relationship with my family ( in Latin America the connection with the family is very important ) so they won’t see me as a failure , a sinner , etc. in all these dreams my family hug me and tell me how much they love me . Since I’m a teenager people have tried to obligate me to love men . I haven’t go through conversion therapy but I have go through the nightmare of receiving beatings and being called a pedophile due to my sexual orientation from my mom , been blackmailed by my sister and see my dad doing nothing just watching me suffer. When all that happened was 2015 and I was still a minor. In 2,017 I had to lie saying I was embarrassed of my sexual orientation and I wanted to compromise myself with changing . I lied because I wanted to study in Law School , yes I know I’m selfish for lying and receiving their money but I was afraid of living alone . This year finally I’m finally graduating , the next year I’ll looking for a job and finally save money . When I was in middle school-high school I had 2 LDR , I don’t have the courage to date with a woman in person but I have always dreamed with the day I can finally travel to a better country , live my best life, maybe meet a woman , falling in love and get married. The changes that the lesbian community has suffered lately makes me feel sick ... for many years my Christian family has tried to make me like men , theoretically putting a penis in my mouth , and now the same community that made me feel safe when I was a minor , telling me I wasn’t wrong for loving a woman it’s doing the same to many women , making us feel guilty with the same tactic that our families have been using for years . Comments are closed.
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