I'm scared to say I'm homosexual. It feels like being open about being exclusively SSA [same-sex attracted] is taboo in the community.
3/31/2021 I just want to be a lesbian who doesn't have to pretend to like transbians and not like transmen in order to be acceptedRead Now I just want to be a lesbian who doesn't have to pretend to like transbians and not like transmen in order to be accepted
My community no longer feels like mine. I’m a bisexual woman, and the larger community won’t even tolerate speaking about same-sex attraction unless they’re using it to get off. I do not exist as a vehicle for validating other people’s identities, and neither do lesbians nor gay men. If you feel like you don’t belong in the gay community, you probably don’t belong.
The misogyny and homophobia from transgender people is such a joke, it's so isolating to be a lesbian when the community that's supposed to accept us hates us.
3/30/2021 It’s become just another space that centres and uplifts abusive males in the name of “inclusivity”Read Now It’s become just another space that centres and uplifts abusive males in the name of “inclusivity”
Lesbians are women who like women. To elaborate for those who don't understand, they are "cisgender" women who love "cisgender" women. The invasion of this space by those who don't experience the oppression women face (because it's entirely sex-based) is abhorrent. It's hard enough to find other wlw as a lesbian, and to have the vast majority of that dating pool become a sausagefest is extremely depressing and an insult to women. I'm tired of going on dating sites and seeing 75% of the "lesbian women" I come across being individuals with penises, and it's even more insulting that they are (9 times out of 10) solely into women. As if that isn't going to be obvious considering their biological makeup? Being a wlw in today's society is an absolute nightmare. It's gotten to the point where I *wish* I could be straight, because it seems like there's hardly anyone who's reasonable or mentally sane in this community anymore.
I feel as if I am preyed upon by the people, especially men, who sexualize me and other lesbians or wish to do horrible things to us.
3/28/2021 even in the lgbtq community, women are pushed to like men, which can be quite suffocating for a lesbianRead Now even in the lgbtq community, women are pushed to like men, which can be quite suffocating for a lesbian
3/27/2021 Please let me have normal relationships with other LGBT people without forcing me into the role of validation dispenserRead Now I hate that I’m constantly guilted into validating other people. Please let me have normal relationships with other LGBT people without forcing me into the role of validation dispenser.
I was a reasonably prominent lesbian activist. All my social life, as well as my job, was in the “women’s community.” A business operated by a collective wanted to move to a more professional management structure, and I, as the only one with a business background, was to be manager.
At the same time, I was a victim of extreme coercive control. All the money I had ever had was in a house I bought to rehab with my partner. The house was in her name, because she was wealthy, and “needed the tax write-off”, I never questioned that until I had spent all my money and two years of work on the house and this business opportunity came up. She went behind my back to the collective and told them I was unsure about taking the job. It would be so much better for me if a recently widowed person bought the business. That’s what happened. I found out after, and asked for my partner to buy out some of my investment in the house (which was all the money in the house) so I could go back to school or buy into another business. She refused, and pointed out that I had “no proof” that anything was mine. Then she moved in a new girlfriend. I was living in my car, working jobs that paid only in food. I was desperate. One of my co-workers at the food job became concerned about me and let me shower at his apartment. He was not making a pass or anything, just compassionate, but that gave her the opening she needed to concoct a story that I had moved out to have relationships with men. Even now, I can look around the internet to see wild stories of our life together, completely rewritten so that I’m either erased or defamed. No one from the community I’d spent years building ever helped me, checked on me, or asked about my side. When I meet young lesbians now, I caution them. There’s a reason it took us so long to get marriage equality. The person with more power, even in lesbian and gay relationships, still has the advantage. And we hate talking about that. |
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