5/5/2021 I didn't want to be called queer, so people took it on themselves to explain why they were going to call me queer anywayRead Now I realized I was a lesbian at 19, after years of painful repression in a deeply conservative and Catholic environment. It was like breaking the surface after nearly drowning. But when I tried to get involved in the gay community I was alienated at every turn. I didn't want to be called queer, so people took it on themselves to explain why they were going to call me queer anyway. I wanted to meet other lesbians, and I didn't understand why that made them so uneasy. I was applauded for wanting to conform to lesbian stereotypes... until I said that I was trying to be more visible in order to find a girlfriend. I realized that my homosexuality was only celebrated superficially...when I expressed desire to do any more than wear fun patterns, people became uneasy. I've met so many "queer" people. I ask if they're SSA. They talk around it and don't want to answer. I can see the answer is no. In truth, the lgbtqia community is devoid of homosexuals at this point, particularly homosexual women. It's a lot like hanging out with conservatives, but with glitter and even more self righteousness. I feel politically homeless, and I resent it. I will not be quiet about the fact that the lgbtqia community does not stand for the lgb anymore. It's been stolen from us.
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